Fertility Friend is depressing me

Well Fertility Friend is putting Ovulation at cd 12, which is sad since I had my iui the morning of cd 13. :( But on a positive side, that is how it was the month I had my tubal pregnancy too. So I know all hope is not lost, but I sure am still kicking myself for not having more sperm to spread around and cover that earlier time frame. pplllleeeaaahhh. Fudge sticks.
My sister said last night that they are really considering moving to W Virginia this fall. Which is horrible, because even if we moved too, it would be the opposite direction. I was hoping she would move to the west coast or near it at least. I have found out the hard way, that it is better to live near family (somewhat near). We wouldn't see my niece, and they would both be far away. I hope they don't go. I was hoping we could all move in the same area somewhere west, then we could drive over for the weekend or something at least, & if her or I was hurt or in labor or sick, the other could drive over- even if it took a good part of a day.
Hope everyone is doing well, & have a good weekend!


{Pic is at Navy Pier in Chicago, copyright June 2007- just as a technical note...all pics on this blog are copyrighted & should not be copied or used in any way except personal reading of this blog!}

Hello spermy, Nice to meet you Eggy

Thanks for you wonderful comments guys. You are all very reassuring and can always make me feel better!

To answer some questions/replies... yes this was Fed Ex shipping from Midwest to my house. Shipping to the Dr probably would have been better. On the other hand, this vial was better than any I have ever had count/motility wise! Nurse even called Dr F over to look at the microscope because she said it was the best frozen specimen she has seen in a long time. Almost every little spermy was swimming when I looked, so that is good. knock, knock...I don't want to jinx myself.

I did have the earliest iui time they would do- 8 am. My temp did not go up drastically yet, so I think I was panicking for no reason, sorry! That pain yesterday morning was the strongest still, but I am just not going to worry about it anymore since I can't do anything about it. All I can do now is cross my fingers and wait. :) Well, and make a mental note to always have 2 vials minimum!

The iui went better than I expected w/less pain and fewer problems searching for my cervix. It wasn't hiding today, so that made things a bit easier. So after planning on a break, we have this one shot thrown in by surprise. Sink or float time. I am now on day 0 of the tww again. FX and if anyone can throw some sticky baby dust, that would be great. I know the odds are not in my favor, I have 1 good tube, no progesterone, and a variety of problems w/my uterus...but there is always a chance and that has kept me going this long. But at some point I just have to be practical & accept that if this iui fails, I will be a mommy sooner if I move on to ivf or adoption. So for now I am visualizing the little swimmers shaking hands with the little eggy and introducing itself. Then I will spend the next 2 weeks making sure my uterus is as hospitable as possible! All embryos welcome here!

{ Pic is sis and niece in Chicago. }

I can't help but stress- I think it's genetic

pic is detail of a stained glass panel in Chicago at Navy Pier stain glass exhibit.

I am amazed that even after I have done this for what seems like a million tries, I still get all worked up. I should know better by now than to have only one vial, but I let the dr & nurse talk me into using just one & now I get to freak out. We are doing iui at 35 hours past trigger shot, but I felt O this morning, have started climbing out of pre-o dip on temps, have less ovary aches today, and show cervix/secondary fertility signs. So I am panicking that Wed morning wil be too late, my eggs will be old. I am kicking myself for not having a second vial so I could do one at home this afternoon and cover a bigger fertile window. AAAAHHHH! K says I have to relax right now, or I am going to screw it up from being stressed out. Fine! I'm going to mow the lawn. humph

scaredy sperm

(Supermom, your superbaby is too cute!) My new post on this mornings u/s came up under Friday since it was a draft (I had saved the pic for later use). Now I know better.
I almost forgot to tell you the sperm hoopla. Our vial arrived today from Fed Ex. I got home & it wasn't here, checked website & it says delivered 1/3 hour ago to front door & left sitting. !! I called Fed Ex who said yes it is sitting at ##19--"oh wait it was dropped at the wrong address." ( My address is ##39- not 19.) WTH! AAAHHH! Panic set in.
I had visions of some little old lady calling the bomb squad when she opened the box to find the tank. Or having a heart attack when she started reading the sperm count paperwork. Or the neighborhood kids thinking it would be fun to play with it. Or...?
So then I hopped into my car, home phone still in hand, to try & find my box. There it was sitting on the front porch at ##19, all by it's self. Thank Heavens! So I look at the label & my address is correct and clear, but behind it in pen someone wrote the other address down and that is where he left it. I called fed ex back & told them how I felt about drivers who change the address on the label for no reason! Whew, I turned some hair white I'm sure.